What a Crazy Week!

The major portion of last week was taken up with getting Jack in to see his pediatrician so that we could get a referral to a neurologist to discuss his food and sleep issues. We saw his primary on Monday afternoon, and Dr. C promised to fax a referral over to the neurologist's office. On Wednesday, I called to try and make an appointment with Dr. K, but they didn't have the referral, so more phone calls to Dr. C's office. Finally got that straightened out and was able to get a cancellation for Friday morning. Woo hoo! But when I told Dr. K's office that Jack also sees a family psychiatrist, they asked to get his records, too. More phone calls and a trip to Dr. M's office early Thursday morning in order to sign a form to release Jack's records to Dr. K. Done and done!

Friday morning we went to see Dr. K. He added another medication to Jack's regimen to "boost" the anti-anxiety meds (poor guy's fingernails are chewed to nubs). The biggest and most unpopular recommendation of all was to limit, if not entirely end, Jack's time on the video games and computer. Dr. K says he's addicted to technology. Well, you can just imagine how this went over with Jack. For someone who has no friends in the neighborhood (except for Miss S, of course) and doesn't play outside, doesn't enjoy reading, has pretty much outgrown the Legos, just what is he supposed to do all day? A big portion of his world at home is playing with his online friends on the PS3, designing game levels and creating costumes. He was sooooo excited about his birthday on Monday and getting the Little Big Planet 2 game he'd been begging for all summer. Needless to say, he was pretty upset by this turn of events. It was hard to take him back to school knowing he was upset. I was worried he would have an "issue" with someone at school, as he was already pretty worked up. 

We were so worried, in fact, that Charlie stopped by the school on his way in to work (late day) just to check on him. He talked to the Principal who called and talked to his teacher in the classroom. Both of them assured  us he was just fine and having a good day.

The video game issue is tough. Charlie feels that Jack is not just playing games, but creating and designing. That's what he wants to do when he grows up. On the other hand, I know study after study has shown that too much technology can change a child's brain function, but then he's not a neurotypical child in the first place anyway so maybe these rules don't apply? For the time being, we've decided to still let him have his games, as long as his homework is finished and he's doing well in school, which he is. We do shut the PS3 off around 7:00 when it's time for him to get in the shower, and afterwards he has a snack and we read for a while before bedtime at 8:30.

On the up side, his new medication is working great! I give it to him, along with a very small dose of melatonin, early in the evening. He's been falling asleep in his own bed (hallelujah!) and one night even slept through the night in his own room! Major miracle! Even when he comes into our room, he's pretty much sleepwalking and goes right back to sleep on his pallet on our floor. At least he's getting the sleep he needs and not staying up till 10:30 or 11:00 at night now. Yay!

Just as the dust was settling on that situation, my 88 year old mother took a fall on Sunday morning while she was out walking Cookie, our Yorkie Poo. I was looking at the computer after church and she'd gone out with Cookie, when a few minutes later she came in the front door and said, "Well, I took a little spill." Fortunately, a kind family who lives in our neighborhood (still don't know exactly who it was) saw her fall, stopped their car and gave her a ride home. I posted a thank you note on our Good Neighbor Facebook page and was pleased to see how many people wrote that they've seen my mom walking the dogs in the neighborhood and hoped she'd be okay.

Thank goodness she didn't break any bones or require any stitches this time (four years ago she broke her wrist, once she bumped her head and had to have four stitches and another time she fell and busted her lip open--nine stitches that time). I took her to the ER and they checked her all out. Also took her to see her regular doctor on Monday morning. She was pretty sore for a couple of days, but is getting better every day. She still has a brace on her right wrist and a bandage on her elbow, but it could have been a lot worse. Bad news for her is that her doctor says she probably shouldn't be out walking by herself anymore. This is going to be hard for her, because she enjoys getting out and walking and considers taking the dogs out one of her "jobs." Up side for me is that maybe I'll get out and walk the dogs, and heaven knows I could use the exercise. Just waiting for the weather to cool off a little bit.

Anyway, that's our past few days in a nutshell. Life is never boring around this house! Thank goodness everyone's relatively healthy and happy. Hope the same for your family!

To Sleep, Perhaps to Dream

Sleep issues! Where to begin?

When Jack was a baby, he slept like, well, a baby. He'd wake up every few hours, I'd changed him, feed him and put him back to bed, where he'd usually go right back to sleep. My husband likes to tell people Jack slept through the night right from the get go. Um, no. I was just a very considerate wife who got up with the baby as soon as he made a peep. I knew I could catch a nap later in the day, since I was the stay-at-home. Hubby needed to sleep, since he was off to work in the morning. Slept through the night, my hiney!

Somewhere between his first and second years, the pattern changed. He was still great about taking daytime naps. I could put him down in the afternoon and I'd be good for two or three hours of uninterrupted Mommy time. (I know some of you hate me for this.) But the nighttime pattern started to change.

Somewhere around 18 months, Jack became a very light sleeper. He would go to sleep in his crib, in his own room, but wake somewhere in the wee hours of the morning, say two or three o'clock. Then we would hang out in the living room, trying to be quiet so Daddy could sleep, watching TV mostly. Eventually he would get sleepy and I could put him back in his crib and tippy toe back to my own bed.

It got to the point where we were afraid to go into his room during the night even to check on him. Should he open his eyes and see me, it was all over. No longer was it sleepy time, it was play time!

Around the time he turned two, his periods of nighttime wakefulness became more frequent. I stopped turning on the TV and just tried to encourage him to go back to sleep. Eventually I just let him fall asleep on the living room floor, covered him with a blanket and went back to bed.

Thinking perhaps he'd just outgrown the crib, I thought a "big boy bed" was the answer. We bought him a sweet, little toddler bed. He was delighted with it. But sleep in it? I think not!

Eventually we just threw a crib mattress on the floor next to our bed. This was fine for a while, except for the fact that he would stay up and watch TV with us until we turned off the light. I was sure we had the only two year old in the neighborhood who watched David Letterman.

Once he started preschool, we had to amend this routine. He was still sleeping on the floor next to our bed (on his own little toddler mattress, of course), but I didn't think it was good for him to be up till all hours if he had to be at school at 8:30. Our bedtime routine became, bath, teeth, stories, then me lying on the bed next to him until he fell asleep. This involved many nights of me trying to sneak off the bed, thinking he was asleep, but as soon as he heard the mattress creak, he'd cry out, "Mommy! Don't leave!"

Jack was in the middle of first grade (6 1/2) when we moved to our new house. He had a beautiful new room with a great big bed in it, but was still sleeping on the floor in our room. Shortly before Christmas that year (he was now 7), I asked him, "Don't you think Santa would be proud of you if you slept in your own room?" To my great surprise he actually bought it and did sleep in his room for a period of about six weeks--till the neighbor kids told him about kidnappers and "bad men." Back in our room on the floor again. Sigh.

Here we are over three years later. Jack is now 10 1/2 and in 5th grade. We now have him falling asleep in his own bed, but he still comes into our room when he wakes during the night. For a while there, he would lie awake until Dad and I turned off the TV in the living room (sometimes an hour and a half, from 8:30 to 10:00 pm!) and then "sneak" into our room to sleep on the floor. With the okay of his doctor, he now takes a very small dose (3 mg) of Melatonin to help him fall asleep (I've read that children on the Autism spectrum don't produce the natural Melatonin they need to fall asleep easily). We have a sleeping bag on the floor now instead of a crib mattress. Some nights he doesn't arrive until 3:30 or 4:30. Only once in the past several months have I woken up in the morning to find him sleeping in his own bed. On that occasion he was actually upset that he'd slept through the night in his own bed (change in routine is very difficult for him) and had to go lie in his sleeping bag for a few minutes to regulate himself. Once I heard him come in at 6:30 and get into his sleeping bag, barely in time for the alarm. Sometimes he'll come into our room and lie awake from the time he arrives till it's time to get up. He's just not a good sleeper.

This is all new to me. When I was a kid, it was very rare that I didn't sleep through the night. I remember snuggling in my bed and next thing, POOF! it was morning. I wish Jack could sleep like that, but his brain is just wired differently than mine. Hopefully by the time he's a teenager, he'll be sleeping in his own room. I can't see him wanting to bunk in with Mom and Dad when he's sixteen. And I'm certainly not going off to college with him. Been there, done that.